Last week My Husband had to play Mr Mom because I was sick. Can I please tell you how hard it was to let him be Mr mom because I am very hands on with my little Monster I am not the type of person who can stay in bed even if I am sick. Here is a little back story I hate not being in control because for so long I had no control but since I took control back I have a hard time giving it up. He did a very good job not like me but he got things done. This morning I woke up feeling much better not fully myself but I vacuumed and took back control it was so nice. My husband was very happy to give me back my Monster keeper status.
This year has had a lot of challenges but man our family has become so close. I hate Covid as much as the next person but this Bit** helped my family in a huge way. How has Covid hurt or help the other Monster Keepers out there? I can’t believe how fast this year has gone by. I have learned some amazing things about me as a mom, wife, women, and person. The things I learned as a mom are I still have so much to learn and that it is ok to to admit that every now and then you are wrong and screw things up!! As a wife I found my voice that I lost so many years ago. The things I have learned as a women is I am so strong way stronger than I could have ever imagined. I learned that as a person I can accomplish anything and I have a voice that I need to use more!!!! My little Monsters have amazed me thought all this covid sh** I can’t believe how resilient they are. These Monster are doing great with everything that they are dealing with in this scary time.
My little Monsters started school this week. They started in person school for the first time in what seams like forever! To say they were nervous would be an understatement. My oldest Monster who’s personalty is “I don’t give a fu**” did not sleep the night before and was very quite the morning of school which if you know him that is not like him at all. The youngest Monster woke up saying “mommy I think I am going to throw up” he was also very quiet. My husband and I took our youngest Monster to school he held my hand and was shaking . I didn’t realize how much covid has effected these kids something that should be a very exciting thing is now turned into a scary thing because of the unknown. My only hope is that these are not the things that these kids remember when they tell stories to their children I hope this is a very distant memory. Our middle Monster just fell right back into her regular routine. She has been in person school the whole time.
Back to school I am not going to lie I am excited and scared!! My youngest Monster is medically complex and too young to get the covid vaccine but with all that said we are choosing to send him to school because he needs to socialize with kids his own age. He is scared about going back I am too but I am putting on a brave face for him so he see that everything that will be ok but inside I am really worried with all the case going back up. I really just want this covid bi*** to go away!!! We are in a new scary world I have been worried about school in the past but nothing this bad. School shopping is very different this time around mask and hand sanitizer are going to be the new normal. My oldest Monster is a different story this homeschool thing really saved him from going down the wrong road and from making bad choices. I am worried about what in-person school for him and what will this do to him. Will he make good choices? Will he stay on the right path? Will he choose the right friends? Will he keep doing the right thing?
My oldest Monster has been telling us that he is feeling trapped in the house like a caged animal. I completely understand the feeling because I feel that same way. He has been telling us he needs to get out and see people but he is scared. He said he is feeling alone. I 100% believe in pandemic depression I am just not sure how they are going to help all these kids. We have an appt with his Dr but I am not sure how is going to help. Our 2 oldest monster got their first covid shot (please don’t come at me with you vaccine opinions because I believe everyone has the right to choose BTW we gave are teenage monster the choice to get it they both choose to get it) but what is life like post pandemic? Will things ever go back to “life before” what does life look like now? As a mom it really sucks not having the answers or not knowing how to help him because everything he is feeling I am feeling too!!!! I really just wish this Covid BIT** never came around!!!!!!!
My youngest monster has sensory processing disorder but this Covid Bi*** is making it crazy his social anxiety is out of control. I have been trying to take him to have playdates with his younger cousins to see if that will help but no he has been out of control he has no idea how to act or deal with his sensory overload. How do I help him without making him a more of a home body than we already are? He was making so much progress before all this happened I feel like he is worse then were we started. I would like to get him back in OT but they are only doing zoom and that kinda defeats the purpose!!! I am so over this pandemic!!
I think with everything this year everyone is ready for this year to be over, but with the reality of everything this year is it really going to be better than last. I am still going to set new goals for the year. I learned a lot this past year with that said I am going to make realistic goals like trying to keep girls night going because I believe that we really need it. I think that with this pandemic as bad as it is there are some realistic goals we can set like work on our marriage work on my mental health I really think that being home and homeschool I need me time to be with my thoughts more then ever. I am also going to keep connecting with my little monsters. We are learning new thing everyday and I love it. I hate what is going on in the world but I am blessed to say that we have really connected as a family in way that I never knew that we could in a time were social media rules these teens my monster are wanting to talk and connect more. I will tell you that I have learned so much from my monsters this year like TikToc dances and how to game lol. My monsters have also learned from me some new card games and I got to show them my love for history. We also talked about some tough things. I loved that we all slowed down. So as much as this covid Bi*** sucks I love that I could connect with my husband, monsters, and family.
PLEASE DON’T LET KIDS READ!!!!!!!!!!
This year has been hell for everyone! I had no idea how to keep the spirit alive and be festive this year. If we are being completely honest I wanted to skip right over it but with a Santa Believer that was out of the question! We also have the added stress of having an immune compromised child. How do you do the holidays in a pandemic? We did find somethings to do I can tell you that I have rolled, cut, and baked way more cookies then I ever have. The kids are not even in the Spirit this year they are so bummed they missed out on so many of the fun activities that we have done in the past. They also missed out on snow days because with remote learning they don’t get them but that is a rant for another blog. I hope that everyone has a great holiday here’s to hoping that 2021 will be better I mean we can only go up from rock bottom RIGHT!!!!!!!
Here are some pictures😀
Sorry I have been a little MIA I have been reflecting on everything going on in the world. I have also been very busy with my new career as a “teacher” homeschool is no joke I am really struggling with it. So here is the thing I never wanted to be a teacher and I got thrown in to this I am so lost. The school district choses to use something new the teachers and students don’t understand it. The parents are thrown to the wolves to pick up the pieces and figure it out all well hoping their child is still learning and not falling behind anymore than they already have. I am very concerned about how far behind my child really is. I am scared of the last effects this will have on these children. How will the social skills be effected? Will they have trouble when everything gets back to “normal” not really sure it will ever go back. How can these kids interact with others when they have been sheltered and only talking to friends and family VIA zoom calls? Will we recover for this? I do have some good things that have happened we are closer as a family we are way more connected. I can also now put “Teacher” on my resume.
This year is going to be very different. My oldest and youngest monsters will be doing homeschool or distance learning and my middle monster will be attending school. Where we live they gave us the option to do in person or online. My husband and I decided that because our oldest and youngest monsters attend public school they will be doing online the middle monster is staring at a new private school so she will be attending in person. We decided that because the private school had a way better plan for in person that she will go. The public school doesn’t have a good plan to keep my monsters safe in my opinion. We are very nervous with everything going on the school has not set up a good plan don’t get me wrong I understand that in these times it is harder to have a good safe plan but I will never put my monsters at risk.
Today we went to our middle monsters back to school orientation. I think that in this time and how things are now is so sad. I watched my middle monster interact with her new peers and teachers with a mask on and 6 feet apart for a child who strives on social interaction I could see that she felt so different and a little sad. In this season of her life of start of high school should be a happy fun experience but no not ever close yes we are making to best of the situation.